Recycled VH1 star in need of ‘Tough Love’

Matchmaker Steve Ward evidently didn’t hit rock bottom last year when he took eight borderline insane (and surprisingly single!) women and attempted to help them find a man on the VH1 series Tough Love. Last night he came back for more with eight new crazies — and this time around, we were greeted with a familiar face.

Rocky, the single mom from California, currently has her hands full raising her 11-year-old daughter Haley and 32 (thirty-two!) animals. Oh, and she’s also busy humiliating her family on national TV. You see, this isn’t Rocky’s first time to grace our television sets. You may recognize her from another VH1 show, I Know My Kid’s a Star (the train wreck conducted by fellow disaster Danny Bonaduce). That show gave Rocky her big break, thanks to a disturbing moment involving her daughter and a tampon string, which made her an instant star in the eyes of Joel McHale and The Soup. (If you care to sit through the highly uncomfortable exchange, click here and skip to 9:45.)

Rocky has taken a break from forcing her daughter to become the next Lindsay Lohan or Britney Spears, because there are more important matters at hand: Mama needs to catch herself a man. And apparently Mama can only find a suitor on a VH1 show with a zero percent success rate (none of last season’s contestants found love). During this process, Rocky will wear a wardrobe that could only be found at your local Hot Topic, flash her breasts in a swimming pool, perform a Kevin Federline-esque rap and reveal that it’s been three years since she’s gotten any action — and that’s just the first episode. The cringe-worthy shenanigans, it seems, have just begun.

Sorry, Haley. Perhaps you would have been better off sticking with Bonaduce.