‘American Idol’ introduces the new Sanjaya

The eighth season of American Idol dragged on last night for what seemed like the 100th week in a row. How are we only down to 36 contestants? Shouldn’t we be crowning the winner already?

The finalists are scattered with clear producer favorites — Danny “The Widower” Gokey and Scott “The Blind Guy” Macintire to name a couple — and the single most annoying person on the planet, Tatiana del Toro. If you don’t believe me, try to sit through 15 seconds of her maniacal laughter:

Now, here’s the thing: She is mildly talented. But there is no amount of singing ability in the world to make up for the fact that this girl actually owns jewelry from the Paula Abdul collection, claiming the night she saw her pimping it on QVC was a sign from God. The producers piled too much crazy on the audience entirely too quickly, and it’s enough to blind us when it comes to the girl’s potential talent.

Luckily, Americans seemingly grew tired of the token annoying contestant who has no business being on our television screens week after week back in 2007, when Sanjaya Malakar was finally booted off the show. And, heaven help me, if this disaster gets voted through to the Top 12, I will officially give up on humanity.