Season’s Greetings, Suckers! Why I will miss those holiday cards
This is the time of year when, if you’re going to send holiday wishes, you’ve got to start moving. To the post office. Some kind of card shop, museum, charity or online source. To a list that, now that we’re firmly ensconced in a paper-shunning age, has dwindled down to a precious (or necessary) few–in my case, aged relatives and the parents of childhood friends who, judging by their enthusiastic responses, still find joy in such communications.
Pretty soon, there will be no one left on my Christmas card list–and frankly, I won’t mourn the loss of the chore. But I do feel a slight nostalgia for the mounds of cards that used to come our way, and what they said about the senders. Like shoe boxes full of old photos, they contained snippets of memories, some even worth retaining.
Maybe that’s why I occasionally stumble on an old holiday card and wonder, Why did I keep this? For the endearing photo of the toddler in a Santa hat? To remind me to return the greeting next year? Because Robert Goulet found it in his heart to remember me–and enclose a photo? (Bob, bless his departed soul, used to send cards to just about any byline he met.)
Often, perversely, I couldn’t bear to part with the long-winded, form letter recaps of other families’ years–letters so removed from incidental pain and routine setbacks that they might as well be titled, “My Life Is More Fabulous Than Yours.” My all-time favorite in this genre: A mistletoe-strewn missive from a corporate president, replete with photos of ski trips, European jaunts, and the ongoing renovation of a multimillion-dollar beach house. Maybe this one should have been called, “How I’m Spending My Massive Compensation Package–Season’s Greetings, Laid-Off Suckers!”
I still look forward to the cards from my artistic friends, small gems each, impossible not to hoard, and more than suitable for framing. I have been intrigued, if puzzled, by the years in which George and Laura Bush chose to send their greetings.
Do you think this season I’ll merit more than an email blast from President Obama? I’ve been good. I didn’t crash his party.

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I’m a fogey. I plan to buy and send out cards and look forward to receiving this year’s batch. I agree that boasting letters are gross but luckily our friends don’t send them.
My major sport is playing Holiday Card Chicken. There are various people I don’t send cards to and hope that I don’t receive one from them. (Of course, nobody who’s reading this fits under this category!) Worst possible scenario occurs when I get a card from one of these people on, say, Dec. 23. Too late for me to reciprocate before Christmas! These %&#@*s have one-upped me! Sound of teeth gnashing is heard throughout the land. Will have to get them next year.
It’s never too late to wish them Happy New Year.
In response to another comment. See in context »