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Mar. 16 2010 - 6:08 pm | 18,341 views | 0 recommendations | 12 comments

Warner Bros. wants you to torture a woman to death

Today, my  friend Xeni Jardin, co-editor of Boing Boing, forwarded me an email from Orna Pickens, a senior publicist at Warner Bros. The subject header read, “One, Two…. Freddy’s Coming for You.” The body of the email was short: “Caffeine pills, self mutilation, a cold shower — what will you do to keep her awake?” And then there was a link.

The link is keepherawake.com, and it takes you to a website, where you will find an attractive, young blond waiting for you to keep her awake. How’re you going to do that? She keeps yawning. She’s sooo sleepy.

It’s going to be a long night, so you start with something light. You click an icon and her alarm clock rings. You make her jump up and down on her bed in her underpants. You get her to read a book. But that’s no fun, right? Maybe you’re a little bored.

You put her in the shower, naked, natch, where the camera wanders across her body. You make her do jumping jacks and watch her boobs bounce in that very tight T-shirt she’s wearing. Still, there’s something missing. Isn’t there something else you can do? Something, say, more … fun?

You decide to apply more aggressive methods. You click the switchblade icon, and she picks up a knife. As you watch, she cuts herself in the side with it, gasping. Hm, not bad, you think. You try another. You click the icon that looks like a lighter, and she picks it up. You look on while she burns her arm, trembling in agony. If you’d known torture was this easy, well …

Unfortunately, now you’ve run out of tricks, and it seems your options are more limited than 18 U.S.C. § 2340. Don’t you hate it when that happens? Slowly, she falls asleep. Suffice to say, in the end, she dies. Too bad all your torturing couldn’t, er, save her.

Don’t worry! It’s not all for naught. You can kill her all over again, or, better yet, show off your torturing expertise by posting how effective your torture session was on your Facebook page. And they said social networking was good for nothing.

Of course, you’ve just been suckered, and the whole thing is a promotion Warner Bros. concocted in connection with the upcoming release of “A Nightmare on Elm Street,” a “re-imagining” of the 1984 movie in which Freddy Krueger, a serial killer who wears a glove with knives for fingers, kills people in their dreams so they die in reality.

Surely, these days, studios like Warner Bros. will do whatever it takes to fill theater seats. Don’t let the guys at Guantanamo Bay have all the fun! the thinking must have been. Everyone can be a torturer. It’s the American way.

Update: As of 9 p.m. PST, Warner Bros. appears to have removed the game and replaced it with a trailer for “A Nightmare on Elm Street.” [Boing Boing]


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  1. collapse expand

    I can why no one has commented. It is hard to find words to express how sick this is; thanks (I think) for sharing it.

  2. collapse expand

    Looks like someone at Warner Bros. woke up and took down the game(?), feature(?), computer based training.

  3. collapse expand

    Typical of Hollywood: Shock the hell out of the public with horrifying behavior. Then step back and say it was all for show. There is no right or wrong as far as they’re concerned.

    Are there really that many voyeurs out there that such uncivilized behavior can make money? How sick is that?

  4. collapse expand

    Sometimes it amazes me the thing that get through the “creative” process to see the light of day. I am sure someone at Warner Bros. thought, hey maybe this is a bad idea, but then someone who was above them wanted this to happen. All around bad decision making. Horror films in themselves are bad enough in introducing gore to our culture, but to allow people to interact with the process is breaking down what makes horror films fun and creating a whole other type of pathology.

  5. collapse expand

    Perhaps the creative and managerial IDIOTS at Warner Brothers who created and allowed this garbage to be put online would benefit by a PUNCH in the face, causing blood to drip out of their broken nose/s. This would not be “torture” but justice.

    This might get their attention.

  6. collapse expand

    I think they’d have something if they put Nancy Pelosi in the video. Everyone would love hacking pieces off of her.

  7. collapse expand

    Great post, Susannah. If the Saw movie franchise is any indication, it would appear that legions of people find torture to be great fun to watch. Quite a culture we have going for for us.

  8. collapse expand

    What a bunch of babies here…The game was fine, even entertaining.
    Its a cliche I know, but the never ending desire to “protect people from themselves” is never ending.

    Comic books, rock and roll, movies, tv, video games, the internet, D and D, and what ever else comes down the pike is supposed to be evil, but our culture is a hell of a lot healthier than it was 20,50, or 100 years ago.

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    About Me

    I'm a freelance journalist, blogger, photographer, and creator of TheWarProject.com. I've written for Newsweek, Details, Harper's Bazaar, The Daily Beast, Radar Online, Variety, Salon, Slate, Wired News, The New York Post, The LA Weekly, The San Francisco Chronicle, The Vancouver Sun, The San Francisco Examiner Magazine, Playboy.com, and many other publications. I've appeared on CNN, Fox News, "Politically Incorrect," and NPR. Currently, I'm working on a novel. My email is susannahbreslin at earthlink dot net.

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