In Britain’s Daily Mail, the news has all gone Jordan

‘We are very much in love’: Katie Price and Alex Reid get married in quickie Las Vegas wedding ceremony By Chris Johnson

Katie Price and Alex Reid have tied the knot in a quickie Las Vegas wedding ceremony surrounded by close friends and, of course, her ubiquitous television crew. But in a move that will stun regular observers, there appears to have been no magazine photographers present to capture the publicity-hungry couple’s nuptials. The pair exchanged vows in the marriage chapel at the Wynn Hotel yesterday at 4pm local time. Price and Reid claim to have deliberately sought to avoid commercialising their wedding to show they are genuinely in love. Happily for fans, however, the ITV2 team who record her every move for What Katie Did Next were on hand to record the blessed moment for posterity.

With this ring: Katie Price and Alex Reid pictured in a jewellery store in Las Vegas yesterday, hours before getting wed in a quickie ceremony

They’d given a hint of their plans a couple of hours as they were spotted shopping for rings near to their five-star Planet Hollywood hotel on Sunset Strip.

via Katie Price and Alex Reid ‘get married in quickie Las Vegas wedding ceremony’ | Mail Online.

One of the saddest things about modern day Britain is that, in some vital respects, the popular culture has become a lot like America’s, only worse. This from the nation which produced PG Wodehouse, The Beatles and The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. The obsession with famous for being famous D-list celebrity culture is a case in point, as is the fact that what used to be far and away the best broadcaster in the world (The BBC) is now producing tacky bloody makeover shows. I myself have an idea for a low-brow reality makeover series. It’s called ‘You Should See Your Face’. Interested producers can email me here.

Top of the D-List heap are of course, Victoria Beckham, and Katie Price, AKA Jordan. Victoria Beckham is the stick-thin, talentless clothes horse who was part of the original Spice Girls line-up. She styled herself ‘Posh’ Spice, as if shopping sprees at Harvey Nichols are all it takes to acquire aristocratic eclat. As soon ‘Posh’ opens her mouth to speak, any suggestion that she is upper crust disappears, although these are nuances which may be lost on the more egalitarian American ear. She is married to David Beckham, who is vaguely famous for having once been a passable football player, but more generally applauded for having a nice physique. Together they live in a large country house that wags have dubbed ‘Beckingham Palace’, (as in Buckingham Palace, you get it?) It is even possible that some readers in the United States will have heard of Ms Beckham.

Meanwhile, famous principally for her cosmetically enhanced, balloon sized breasts, the only thing vaguely posh about Price/Jordan, is her fondness for horses. The British of course, are renowned for preferring animals to people, and the more  high-born, the truer is this adage. Anyway, Jordan’s equestrian streak prompted her to release a series of children’s books called Katie Price’s Perfect Ponies. Because what every little, horse-obsessed princess needs in her library are books ghost-written by a so-called glamour model associated with silicon breasts, botox, short-lived marriages and (of course) bootleg sex tapes.  She has just married a cross-dressing cage fighter who I am given to understand, lost a nipple in some rough sex horseplay. Eugh. Nonetheless, Britain’s tabloid newspapers are obsessed by the woman’s every move, but as far as I can see, although her addiction to Botox is well documented, no-one has ever pointed out why she seems to have a faint but discernible moustache above her upper lip.

As said, the newspaper from which this scintillating and critical news story was ripped is The Daily Mail, which seems to be shifting its retirement-home army-colonel’s monocled-eye from more usual fare. Which is to say, paedophiles, illegal immigrants, asylum seekers and Islamic terrorists. Dire stuff.