If Carly Fiorina Loses, Demon Sheep Will Enslave Californians
For those of you who thought that “Gathering Storm” video warning of the impending doom gay marriage would unleash on the nation was the most hilarious conservative attack ad ever created, I submit to you a new contender. Carly Fiorina’s ad attacking Tom Campbell, her rival for the GOP nomination to challenge current Sen. Barbara Boxer appears to be a brilliant exercise in self-parody. Except, it’s not.
Though I’ve watched it several times now – volume on – I’ve only been able to conclude so far that if Californians pick Campbell over Fiorina, they will be at the mercy of actual sheep, robot sheep (that may or may not have the ability to shoot lasers from their eyes), and men dressed as sheep. Aiding them in their plot to target humans will be the occasional barnyard pig. Or, the message is that Tom Campbell is a pig and a sheep. Like I said, I can’t really tell.
Like the “Gathering Storm” video, Fiorina’s ad also employs scary, ominous music, cartoon lightning bolts, and the invasion of pitch-black skies. One of the lightning bolts is so intense, it knocks a sheep from its computer-generated platform and sends it spiraling into a dark abyss.
All the while, we’re being bombarded with hyper-dense language, spoken at five times the speed of normal human speech, like: ”a budget about which the respected nonpartisan California Legislative Analysts office wrote ‘multibillion-dollar operative deficits will persist.’”
The “Gathering Storm” video quickly spawned a celebrity-heavy spoof video titled “A Gaythering Storm.” I’m not sure any spoof of Fiorina’s ad could eclipse the hilariousness of the commercial itself, but I won’t be upset if someone takes a stab at it.
UPDATE: @demonsheep now has its own Twitter account, and has sent out tweets like “I will win the hearts and minds of America’s enemies. And then I will eat them” and “If I were mortal, I would be an endangered species. Since I am not, consider me a dangerous species.”