Daley Discovers Privatization Sucks $1.15 Billion Too Late

“You can’t even sell a public asset today,” lamented Mayor Daley wistfully.

The Mayor’s complaint came in response to mounting questions over his $1.15 billion lease of the city’s parking meters to a company that has proven incompetent to running those meters.  As so often happens in Daleyspeak, the direction and meaning of the words can go in more than one direction.

What the Mayor meant was to congratulate himself on the timing of the deal, suggesting that the $14.8 million per year from Chicago Parking Meters, LLC was the absolute best the city could get.

To believe that, one has to swallow that Chicagoans only pump $40,000 per day in quarters into the parking meters of the city – a ridiculous presumption that is one complaint in the lawsuit being levied against the city on behalf of the public by the Independent Voters of Illinois – Independent Precinct Organization.  IVI-IPO says the city should have gotten between $2 and $3.5 billion for such a lease – but they also say the deal is an outright illegal use of public funds and distortion of the law that places the power to rescind driving privileges in the hands of a private corporation through the issuance of tickets.

“[The meters were] sold at the highest time. You can’t even sell a public asset today.  You can’t sell anything today” says the Mayor.

Given his lousy negotiation and vetting skills, I’d consider the city lucky to escape the specter of further privatization boondoggles, but what did he have on his mind that the economic downturn has put the kibosh on?

Lake Shore Drive renamed to Doritos Way?

Selling the Chicago River fishing rights to Honeywell (thermostats need mercury after all, and the fish have plenty.)

Perhaps Lincoln Park Zoo to Oscar Mayer, so the world may be introduced to Seal and Pimento loaf?

Individual pothole sponsorships?  Beach lifeguards replaced with a phone connected to a call center in Bangalore?  Cops directing traffic replaced with near-minimum-wage workers?

Wait, we did that one already.

“You can’t even sell a public asset today?”  Blessing counted.

Daley losing confidence in parking meter company :: CHICAGO SUN-TIMES :: City Hall.