About Me

I am currently Wonkette's man-strumpet/gossip columnist. Assuming nothing catastrophic happens in the next two semesters, I will graduate from Wheaton College in May, 2010 -- no, not from the nutty Christian jihad Wheaton. The other one, the one you've never heard of, in Massachusetts.

And I will never have to pay off my massive student debt, because the 2012 Aztec Apocalypse is just around the corner. Joke's on you, Sallie Mae!