4 fantastic actresses who could get buggie with Viggo in Cronenberg’s ‘The Fly’ reboot

David and Viggo... sittin' in a tree...

Film history has given us some pretty famous pairings. Hitchcock and Grace Kelly. Billy Wilder and Jack Lemmon. Ridley Scott and Russell Crowe. Soderbergh and Clooney. Hell, the Coen Brothers and Clooney. And lately, with two well-received pairings behind them and talk of others on the way, we can add David Cronenberg and Viggo Mortensen to the list.

After a couple years of lying low, Cronenberg is now pursuing a slew of new projects. In another surprising move (the first being his attachment to a, uh, Tom Cruise movie), the Canadian filmmaker has apparently decided to remake his own 1986 remake of The Fly. I would be shocked, shocked if Viggo didn’t slip on Seth Brundlefly’s eight little bug booties. I’m not totally sure I get what David’s after here. I know, remaking one’s own film has become, of late, a sort of trend. All the cool kids are doing it. Peer pressure, man. Haneke reshot Funny Games, as an exercise in casting and redundancy. But Cronenberg’s The Fly is a modern classic. Why redo it? Why now? It usually comes down to technology. That’s what they say. They talk of advances. Okay. Sure. Whatever. I’ve got email now too. My apps launch in a nanosecond. I can read restaurant reviews on my phone. I get it. But I recall a lot of pretty good practical effects in Cronenberg’s Fly and not a whole lot of (if any) CG effects. Does that mean the new bug will resemble a slightly hairy version of the new Hulk? I sure as hell hope not. And techmology does not a great film make.

Halfway there already.

Having never compared Viggo and Jeff Goldblum (why would you do such in a thing?), I can now see some similarities. Viggo’s a lot like a handsome, sexy version of Goldblum, actually. He’s got Goldblum’s quirky, something’s-a-little-off-here charm. He’s got the same intense energy that Goldblum brought to the role. Remember how scared he made poor Geena Davis? All she wanted was a boyfriend; instead she got a disgusting mess. And her protector dude got his hand and foot barfed off. Nice. I hate it when that happens. Imagining what Viggo would bring to that uncomfortably drawn out man-to-bug transformation, I actually get excited about this remake. I get chills.

So, if Viggo’s on board, which he undoubtedly is, what about Mrs. Brundlefly? Here’s what I think.

Maria Bello, from 'A History of Violence.'

I’m not sure Cronenberg would want to go here again, but I’m pulling for Maria Bello. She and Viggo had a hellish chemistry on A History of Violence, and Ms. Bello has proven herself a pretty fearless creature. Why should Cronenberg limit his obsessive muse thing to just one peep? Hitchcock didn’t. I’ve got nothing against that other blond actress, but I think Eastern Promises would have been a lot better had Maria Bello been in it.

Charlize Theron.

However, Charlize Theron shares pretty much all of Maria Bello’s qualities.

She’s ridiculously beautiful (see right), daring, really quite talented, and eager to do tough work with great peeps. Plus? I hear she’s fun to work with. You know, pleasant. Not insane. That’s what I hear. I’ve never worked with her myself. Though she’s not yet worked with Cronenberg, she has shared the box with Viggo, in The Road, which will descend upon us all very soon like a big black depressing cloud of depressing gloomy gloom.

Jennifer Connelly.

Another ridiculously beautiful and talented actress is Jennifer Connelly. Cronenberg doesn’t work with bimbos. Holly Hunter, Debbie Harry, Jennifer Jason Leigh. This is the caliber of actress the guy attracts. Jennifer Connelly’s come a long way since Labyrinth, baby. Granted, she was, what back then? 12? But she had the looks. She’s always had the looks. She was born with the looks. But the acting… that’s come but lately. I think Requiem for a Dream is the one that did it. That ‘ass to ass’ scene? Ouch. We’re talking guts. She’d been okay in a few movies before Dream, but she’s been consistently great in pretty much every movie since. Thank you, Darren Aronofsky.

Marion Cotillard. Oui.

But possibly the most interesting choice Cronenberg could make would be Marion Cotillard. In La Vi En Rose, Cotillard brought Edith Piaf back to life and elevated an average biopic to something almost sublime. She lent warmth and beauty to Public Enemies, Michael Mann’s fantastic and shamefully unappreciated film. Without her, the film would have drowned in gray tones. She brought the color. Since then she’s been working both in France and the U.S. She’ll soon be seen in Christopher Nolan’s hugely anticipated Inception. She’s making some interesting choices, that Marion, rather than blowing her golden ticket on one big ka-thing. I think holding hands with Cronenberg’s only a matter of time. She’d also understand right away what he meant by all that soixante-neuf stuff.