Brian Cashman: The Bad Lieutenant
The GM of the New York Yankees may be the worst ever at the best job in the world. Which is why he’ll inevitably fail this year in his shameless attempt to buy a World Series.
By Matt Taibbi
There are some jobs in this world that are really, really hard to screw up. If the title on your business card reads something like “Mrs. Aristotle Onassis” or “Mrs. Prince Rainier of Monaco” or “Mrs. Bald-and-Sweaty International Arms-Trading Gazillionaire Adnan Khashoggi” — if you need a team of Sherpas just to carry the credit cards issued in your name — it’s probably not unreasonable to assume that you know a thing or two about shopping…
read the rest here: Brian Cashman: The Bad Lieutenant | Men’s Journal.
This is a piece I wrote about the Yankees GM for Men’s Journal. I have to admit I kind of expected to get this one wrong when I wrote it months ago, and I fully expect the Yankees to rally back very soon, so I’m posting this now while it still looks prescient.
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As a lifelong Yankee fan, I find it ammusing to hear Red Sox fans (which I assume you are) disect the Yankee organization. I guess it’s understandable, seeing the Sawks were the laughing stock of baseball for so many years, it must feel good to let out the hostility that built up all that time. What’s astounding though, is the Red Sox are consistently among the top spenders in baseball. While no one matches what the Yankees spend, the sawks organization spends ALOT of money and doesn’t produce winners every year, in fact until 2006 they produced NO winners while still spending alot of money. Clearly spending money alone does not produce championships and any Yankee fan (and I assume management) knows this, and has never admitted to it. This “chemistry” thing so consistanly vomited out of Sawks fans mouth is NOT the only reason they, or any team, has won championships (it’s one part). You need top notch seasoned players who cost more money. Yes, there are examples of teams that have won without high payed players, but all that means is there were MANY teams who had high priced players that lost also. Trying to find a balance of players, chemistry, and luck needed to result in a championship team in ANY sport is difficult. So to say Brian Cashman has an easy job because he has access to the worlds biggest checkbook is just silly. No one, even the beloved Theo Epstein, can predict how a player will produce or fit in with a team. They cannot control injuries or slump years, they just sign them, and hope for the best. He has done an incredible job for the past few years, but it will run out, it always does. Baseball is a game of waves and the higher that wave gets, the farther it falls. So ride your wave of glory for now, it’s fun, we Yankee fans have done it for decades. But just know this, Mr. Epstein has now set the bar REALLY high. The Red Sox are now at a level where the fans expect to make the playoffs. That’s incredibly difficult to pull off year after year. Keep in mind, this fantastic farm system built is going to have to keep a pretty big checkbook for those players. It will be interesting to watch.
And here is a little wake up call…you Sox fans are glorious only in your own little “nation”. I know MANY fans who like MANY different teams, who despise the REd Sox just as much as the Yankees, some even more. Not because of the team or the organization, but because of the fans. The obsurdly over the top self righteousness is obnoxious, and the tone of this column proves it.
Brilliant, absolutely brilliant. I love watching a Yankee fan meltdown when his team is called out. Pure comedic gold. All that bitterness has got to wreak havoc on your stress levels.
Thanks for the laugh.
BTW, alot is actually two words not one. As in, the Spankees spend A LOT more money than all other teams.
Again, thanks for the laugh and enjoy those ticket prices.
In response to another comment. See in context »PLEEEEEEAAASE write something about the most recent revelations surrounding…Bitch Tits!
A grateful baseball nation thanks you.
That knuckle bump you just felt was Steve Gilliard dapping you from Heaven. Oh, and fuck the fucking Yankees. That is all.