Oh, the power one must have to coerce a crowd of college students into ridiculous behavior via mass tweet. I am in awe.

I never thought I’d see the day when my classmates at Loyola University would be scampering around campus, wearing nothing but taped-together pieces of our university newspaper in an attempt to win prizes from a celebrity talk show host.

But, like, that totally just happened. Huh?

Apparently, Ellen DeGeneres’ show (big fan, btw) stopped by campus and challenged my campus via Twitter to create outfits made of paper, the best of which would win their wearer a PS3. Given the availability of paper products on a university campus, I suppose covering yourself in the Phoenix was a natural choice. But as I sit here in the campus library typing this, I’m not sure if, as the head honcho of said publication, I should be grateful for the publicity, or a little offended (only because the front page that people were strapping to their business had the obituary of a fellow student printed on it).

You could say it’s been a weird night.

I need some therapy via posting.

So, even though I usually post about politics, I’m just gonna roll with the punches here and keep goin’ with that whole “weird” theme.

For your Friday night prime-time Web-surfing pleasure, I bring you the five best weird news stories to come out of the Chicagoland area since the Dave Matthews Band got sued for dumping poop on a boat full of tourists.

Image by AFP/Getty Images via Daylife

1) There was a 10-foot-tall pot plant growing on a public corner in Rogers Park??

I kid you not, this thing was a behemoth. And apparently it was just chillin’ there, growing away while neighbors walked past it every day to the El stop or Devon Market. Check out the flickr pic here.

“The plant was located steps from the apartments on 6748 N. Newgard Ave., close to the corner of Newgard and Pratt Avenues. The plant was growing amongst the flourishing vegetation, including trees, bushes and grass that line the block.

“The person who reported the plant on Thursday, Sept. 10 to Chicago Police asked to remain anonymous, according to a Chicago Police News Affairs spokesperson. The person who found it waved down a Chicago Police officer who identified the plant. No name for the officer was provided. Police removed the plant and took it to be inventoried.

via Chicago Police remove marijuana plant

Image via Wikipedia

2) Huge wiener hits house. No, seriously.

But does the wiener in question have collision insurance? I bet Nick Krupp would like to know, seeing as the famous Oscar Mayer Weinermobile itself crashed into his home in the Chicago suburb of Mount Pleasant earlier this summer. At least it seems like the guy had a sense of humor about it (and, coincidentally we now have this picture to share with all our coworkers during “authorized distraction” time).

A 12-foot tire skid mark showed how fast the wienermobile – powered by a V-8, 350 Vortec engine, according to the company’s Web site – must have accelerated.

Surveying a piece of fiberglass left at the scene, Krupp asked, “That’s part of the bun, right?”

via Vehicle batters house; easy to get description

Image via Wikipedia

3) That’s NOT in my job description

Okay, I don’t know if this one is more on the “huh, that’s odd” side, or the “poignantly sighing while burdened with the knowledge that humanity could behave so badly” side of weird happenings. Probably the latter. But I feel compelled to share it, if only as a warning to other Chicago professionals not to solicit secretary/prostitutes on CraigsList. I can’t believe I just had to write that …

A Chicago Immigration attorney is facing sanctions after he demanded “sexual interaction with me and my partner” as a job condition from a woman seeking a position as legal assistant at their firm.

After the woman responded to an ad that Samir Chowhan placed in the “Adult Gigs” section of Craigslist, he told her in a follow-up e-mail that she would also need to “perform for us sexually” as “part of the interview process.”

via Attorney may face disciplinary action over ad seeking secretary on Craigslist

According to the same Chicago Tribune article, Chowhan first denied the post but “later admitted it” according to a complaint the woman filed with the Illinois Attorney Registration & Disciplinary Commission. I would make some sort of witty comment here but I’m too creeped out. Moving on *shiver*…

Delicious, yes. But can you wash yourself with it?

4) When beer meets bathing

Okay, something a little more lighthearted is in order, I think. And here it is: thanks to an innovative Chicago brewery, you can literally bathe yourself in beer. Well, beer soap, more precisely.

The Half Acre Beer Company is selling soap made with beer for $6 a bar at its brewery store at 4257 N. Lincoln.

The beer soap is made by Grandma Gee’s, owned by Jim Gregory, an Indiana college student. Gregory, 22, who grew up in southern Indiana and is a senior at Hanover College, claims beer “macronutrients” are good for skin and hair.

via Now you can have beer in the shower

The article goes on to say that the makers added several fragrances to the mix so as to avoid that night-after-a-kegger smell. That’s right — thanks to Chicago ingenuity, you can now get sudsy with some suds.

And finally…

5) Hair to the throne

Yep, you’re seeing that right. That is indeed the Illinois state capital building in Springfield wearing a full-on Blago coif, with an impersonator of the man himself stoking his own impressive mane. The image comes from Republican gubernatorial candidate Andy McKenna’s latest commercial. If you’re so inclined (or curious what a baby and a golf ball also look like with Blago hair) you can catch the whole thing here. Admittedly, this is a little more state-centric that Chicago-specific, but it was just too good to pass up.

Phew, what a list! I knew we Windy City Citizens were a little odd, but man! Strangely, writing this has made me feel better, though. No hard feelings, Ellen. And I can’t wait to watch my classmates making fools out of themselves on your show.