Daily Dosage: Strength sauce for seniors

"And then my doctor said: BeneVia"

Gym time and healthy eating seem to be insurmountable challenges for most Americans. And it doesn’t get any easier as we age: those over 50 have all sorts of important obligations that keep them from living their healthiest life. The title of World’s Best Grandma doesn’t come easy, right?

A recent study in the Journal of Clinical Nutrition concluded that 40 percent of older Americans don’t get enough protein, which accounts for some of the muscle loss and deterioration that accompanies aging-related ailments and chronic health problems.

But don’t sweat it, gramps. You can keep subsisting on Bridge Mix, because there’s a pharmaceutical beverage to cure what ails ya.

A new drink-maker has entered the functional foods fray, creating yet another nutritional cop-out for those who can’t quite muster the ability to eat a balanced diet. HealthSpan Solutions are marketing BeneVia as “a balanced nutrition drink with essential vitamins and minerals for healthy aging.” This fruity nursing home elixir comes in four varieties, each with different additives:

• Strength & Energy – A combo of protein and Creatine
• Memory & Focus – Omega-3s and Lutein
• Heart Health – A protein blend and Phytosterols
• Immune Protect – Omega-3s and Amino Acids

Sadly, a senior can’t have their bulging biceps and remember them too: strength and recollection are apparently mutually exclusive in BeneVia Land. The only way to make this functional food really work for you? A four-part cocktail. One the rocks with a nip of brandy, a La-Z-Boy recliner and a bowl of peanuts, and you just described the final two decades of my grandparent’s existence…minus all that strength, memory and health stuff.