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Feb. 9 2010 — 11:24 am | 55 views | 0 recommendations | 1 comment

John Bolton still would like very much to bomb Iran

Former UN ambassador John Bolton

Former UN ambassador John Bolton

Every time I read ThinkProgress, there’s a new report about how John Bolton is fed up with all of this not-bombing-Iran business, because seriously let’s bomb them already. WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?  It’s quite remarkable, actually.  This elementary Google search shows you just how regularly JoBo goes on a televised “program” on FoxNews to advocate on behalf on the powerful Fuck Iran Let’s Bomb Them lobby, whose headquarters remains located in JoBo’s warrior moustache, to advance their bomb Iran agenda.  

Since yesterday was a day, in a year, on Earth, John Bolton once again woke up, grew a moustache, and said to himself, Today, I’d like to bomb Iran.  ThinkProgress reports:

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Feb. 5 2010 — 3:42 pm | 838 views | 1 recommendations | 2 comments

Glenn Beck fires opening salvo of Barack-gate

Respected race theorist Glenn Beck has made the world a better place, as he is want to do, by — wait for it — stoking White, nativist fears about our crazy black man president and his crazy black man president name.  Beck, to his credit, has found what works — stoking White, nativist fear — and he has stuck with it.  No point in reinventing the wheel, or, in Beck’s case, the Hood.  Welcome to Barack-gate 2010!  continue »



Feb. 4 2010 — 12:29 pm | 1,403 views | 0 recommendations | 14 comments

Report claims Israel stole $2B from Palestinians

The American Journalist at work

The American Journalist at work

The American media is known primarily for its sobriety and even-handedness, especially concerning Palestinian rights, which is why I’m deeply surprised that the latest controversy out of Israel hasn’t been covered by any American media outlets at all.

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Feb. 3 2010 — 1:49 pm | 431 views | 1 recommendations | 0 comments

Poll shows most GOP voters actually caricatures of GOP voters

208x228_Asinine-America-EUROPE-IS-A-STUPID-COUNTRYSo here’s a good reason to dust off those Bush-era ”Europe or Bust” signs, pack your vintage WWII suitcase full of porno and cigarettes, and just buy a ticket to anywhere but America. 

It seems DailyKos commissioned Research 2000 — a nonpartisan, independent polling firm — to ask 2,000 self-identified Republicans just how bat shit insane they are, and the resounding answer the pollsters got was, “VERY!”  

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Feb. 3 2010 — 11:08 am | 69 views | 1 recommendations | 0 comments

Obama and GOP Super Bowl party will end on WH lawn in drunken brawl

touchdownBarack Obama, the man who famously wouldn’t invite  rockin’ Orrin Hatch’s personal mormon football team and their hundreds of wives to the White House, has decided that he doesn’t want to be alone on Super Bowl Sunday Sunday Sunday: 

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About Me

I'm a stand up comedian and writer based out of Brooklyn, NY. I contribute regularly to The Onion, and my comedy sketches have been featured on The New York Times' humor blog and CNN.

My sister and I have a web series called John and Molly Get Along, which can be found on Youtube.

Sometimes I still wish I were in a punk band. Man, that was really fun.

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Contributor Since: November 2009
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