Music’s slowest stars: Monsters of rock, pop and R&B keep us impatiently waiting

Although I excelled in math in school, it was never my favorite subject. Nonetheless, yesterday, just for fun, I decided to do some light calculating. If the Beatles released six landmark albums between the December 1965 and May 1970 — and they did, with Rubber Soul, Revolver, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, Magical Mystery Tour, The White Album and Abbey Road among the band’s nine productions – that averages to roughly one classic every nine months.

Recording artists were so much more prolific back then. In their peak years, many of them stayed on the charts pretty much constantly by continuously producing new music. Even in the 1970s, a band like Fleetwood Mac produced three great albums — Fleetwood Mac, Rumors and Tusk (my personal favorite) in a four-year span, 1975 to 1979. And in the ’80s and early ’90s, Prince churned out new music on a yearly basis, battling his label, Warner Bros. Records,  for the right to bombard the public with an annual Prince album.

In comparison, aside from Lady Gaga and Rihanna, who seemingly have not been without a hit single in circulation since their debuts, today, music stars are a pretty slow bunch. For most A-list acts, three to four years between albums is the norm, the gold-and-platinum standard.

Take Red Hot Chili Peppers, who, for some reason, popped into my head yesterday. The band’s most recent album, Stadium Aracadium, came out in May of 2006. A new album is coming in 2011 (with new guitarist Josh Klinghoffer replacing the departed John Frusciante), according to Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith, which would make the time span between releases half a decade. There are a number of reasons for today’s decreased emphasis on recording: more time spent on the road (the Chili Peppers themselves cited touring burnout before going on hiatus), the longer shelf life of albums that produce multiple hit singles, and decreased income from album sales in today’s financially struggling music industry.

For some slow-poke superstars, there’s the seniority factor. The likes of Stevie Wonder and Aretha Franklin have earned the right to take extended breaks, and let’s face it, their best work is at least three decades behind them anyway. But for me, it’s always a head-scratcher when an act in its creative and commercial prime like the Chili Peppers, for whom Stadium Arcadium was the band’s first No. 1 album, drops out. Here are nine acts other than the Chili Peppers, Amy Winehouse (on whom I’ve already put a rush) and Dixie Chicks that have me praying for a swift, safe return.

The White Stripes In the three years since Icky Thump, Meg and Jack White both have suffered medical setbacks, but Jack has said that new music is in the works. Next time they take an extended leave of absence, Jack should work his production magic with another golden oldie from country music, as he did with Loretta Lynn on her 2004 Grammy winner Van Lear Rose. Just imagine what he could cook up with Dolly Parton or George Jones.

Justin Timberlake It almost feels like he never went away, since he’s been featured on nearly a dozen singles (including hits with Madonna, Ciara and Timbaland), since his last album, Future Sex/Love Sounds, was released in 2006. And he will appear on the forthcoming Sheryl Crow album, 100 Miles from Memphis, which comes out next Tuesday. But if nothing else, I’m curious to see how a new Timberlake set would fare in today’s musical climate.

Kate Bush After releasing five albums between 1978 and 1985, Bush began to take her cool, sweet time. Her last release, 2005’s Aerial, was 12 years coming. At that rate, she should return with her next effort sometime around her 60th birthday.

Enya Yesterday during my Pilates class, my instructor was playing Enya’s Shepherd Moons in the background, which reminded me that it’s been seven years since her last studio album, Amarantine. And no, Christmas albums (2008’s And Winter Came…), which I hate in theory, don’t count.

Sting Are you reading this, Sting? Last year’s If on a Winter’s Night… didn’t cut it. (And what’s with the ellipses?) For Sting’s pop and rock fans waiting for a proper follow-up to 2003’s Sacred Love, neither did 2006’s Songs from the Labyrinth, judging from its commercial reception. It’s Sting’s only solo album not to go gold in the U.S. or in the UK.

Shania Twain It’s been eight years since Up!, and during that time, Twain became a mother and a divorcee. She deserves a break. But couldn’t she skip Why Not? With Shania Twain, the reality show due to debut in 2011 on OWN: The Oprah Winfrey Network, and give us some new music instead?

Missy Elliott Remember when Elliott used to give us at least one hot jam a year? There hasn’t been a new album since 2005’s The Cookbook, and Block Party, its follow-up, has been in the works for years. She earned some time off after delivering six platinum albums in eight years, but in the rapidly changing game of hip hop, it might cost her. Five years on the sidelines may not have diminished Eminem’s star and sales power — half a decaded separated 2004’s Encore and last year’s Relapse — but Elliott will have to deliver “Work It”-caliber musical goods to strike platinum again.

David Bowie and Joni Mitchell Both are firmly in the category of legends with the right to go gently into that good night. But considering that both Bowie and Mitchell were on creative rolls as of their last albums — 2003’s Heathen and 2007’s Shine, respectively — and Mitchell has threatened retirement before, I’m hoping for a final encore before they hang up their microphones for good.