O.J. Simpson’s Suit Rejected From Smithsonian: Yes, But Have You Seen Him Rap?

I was shocked to read that the very suit O.J. Simpson wore during his infamous double-murder trial was rejected by the Smithsonian Institution as a genuine artifact of Americana. Damn you Smithsonian, damn you!  The O.J. Simpson story is as American as it gets. It tells the rise-and-fall of the American Dream in better details than The Great Gatsby: a man who came from poverty, got it all (fame, wealth, a beautiful wife), and through a tragic flaw lost everything.

Can you imagine O.J.’s murder trial suit on display next to Fonzi’s jacket and Archie Bunker’s chair? I think it would look great alongside other cultural shames as George W. Bush’s flight jacket he wore on the  aircraft carrier  during his Mission Accomplished speech.

What people don’t realize is Americans’ adore O.J. Simpson: Americans’ love the cult of celebrity and O.J. Simpson is one of the most famous people they might ever encounter. I know this first hand when a few years back I was hired to work on a zany Punk’d, hidden camera ripoff entitled, Juice’d. It was a hidden camera show where after a prank would be pulled,O.J. Simpson would pop out and say, “You’ve been Juice’d.”

I was hired to be O.J.’s funny, little sidekick; I spent 2 weeks filming hidden camera pranks with O.J.

Read on to find out a taste of this train wreck of Americana was like……..

In a nondescript recording studio in Burbank, we’re waiting for OJ to show up, in the same anticipation as on the set of Apocalypse Now, waiting for an overweight Brando.

A weird hush comes over the crew as OJ arrives with his handlers, talking on a cell phone, walking with a fragile limp. I was expecting OJ to be Fat Albert fat. But he’s not (though have a really large head in turns of cranial capacity).  A shady entourage surrounds the affair. I heard Warren G, OJ’s bodyguard, just got out of jail, his driver doesn’t have a driver’s license, and some LA manager-type in a sports coat keeps saying things on his cell phone like, “I’m hanging out with OJ right now. I could sell this footage to 20/20 for twenty grand.”

OJ has been made to dress like a gangsta rapper (ironically wearing a wife-beater).   The first thing OJ Simpson says to me is “Why don’t you push me!” I’ve just met OJ and now he wants me to shove him. The “funny” prank involves singers and dancers coming in for an audition. All they know is it’s for a celebrity’s music video. What these “victims” won’t know, the celebrity is actually, yes, OJ Simpson.

“This is my first audition,” shares an enthusiastic 18-year-old. She drove an hour to get here, one of the dozens of hopeful performers who’ve taken time out of their day with big dreams (stupid people with their dreams), thinking they’re here for an audition, only to soon be humiliated on camera. I feel bad. We’re just wasting people’s time.

“When the ad says I’d make $750 per day, that pisses me off,” screams an auditioner, afterwards, clearly not happy with the free Juiced T-shirt.

While wearing a pink belly-shirt and going by the name Power, my part is to go in and audition with a group of dancers, screw things up, and then get in a big argument with OJ Simpson. So, as requested, I shove OJ (I think I even scream “Do you want a piece of me!”).

I expected once OJ made an appearance, people would freak out and run screaming from the room. I expected people to react with horror. There most likely would be crying. Some might think, yes, the devil himself now has a reality show. But that’s not the case at all.

“You’ve been Juiced!”

People are actually thrilled to meet OJ Simpson (it’s great he gets to show America his practical joking side). They, instead, react with celebrity worship. After all, OJ was, innocent in one of his two trials

“Why don’t you all dance around OJ,” the director instructs a group of excited girls.

OJ, attempting to be the lady’s man, adds “This is not working out, but if you want to have dinner later…”

Yes, OJ loves the ladies. Later, while wearing disguise in a tropical fish store, he tries to be suave with a girl asking, “If I were OJ, would you try to go out with me?”

“I’m only seventeen,” replies the girl.

OJ retorts, “If you were eighteen, I’d try and go out with you!”