Imagining how the Rios deal really went down
Toronto is finally free of this (Image by Keith Allison via Flickr)
Yesterday, Alex Rios was claimed off of waivers by the Chicago White Sox. In exchange for the outfielder, the Blue Jays received nothing but the relief of having shed Rios’ burdensome contract. We can only assume the transaction went down like this….
Operator: Hello, you’ve received a collect call from…Blue Jays. Would you like to accept?
White Sox: Uh, sure. Yes.
Blue Jays: Heyyy White Sox. Sorry about that, we’re cutting back on costs. You know how it is.
Sox: Sure, no problem. Actually, I didn’t even know they still have collect calling. So what’s up?
Jays: Take Alex Rios, please.
Sox: No way.
Jays: C’mon White Sox, pleeease. We can’t even afford car phones.
Sox: Car phones? What is this 1995?
Jays: No, Canada.
Sox: Wow, ok. Well, I’m sorry but we don’t have anyone to exchange….
Jays: Deal!
Sox: What?
Jays: Great negotiating with you, as always. You drive a hard bargain, but we’re willing to accept your offer of nothing in exchange for Alex Rios. He’ll be in Chicago by tomorrow morning.
Sox: Wait…I, uh…hold on a seco…..
CLICK…dial tone.
Sox: Damn those Canadians.
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HA! Us Canucks sure know how to haggle… If only we can convince Joe Carter to come out of retirement.
At this point it couldn’t hurt them, right?
Bring back the entire winning squad…Cito is already there, how far off can Cecil, Carter, Jimmy Key, Hentgen, Alomar and Olerud be?
Alas, it turns out Toronto already got the old gang back together this year – did them know good – http://www.cbc.ca/sports/baseball/story/2009/08/07/sp-mlb-bal-tor.html