If you pour tequila all over the carpet and then drop a match into it, it will make a big event.

RIDE TO LIVE
LIVE TO RIDE

EMPTY hotel PArtEEEEeee

I am the first person to throw a burning mattress out of the second-story window of a blog.

EMPTY
HOTEL =
PARRRRRRRRRTY

People are asking why the lights keep flickering in the atrium.

It’s because the extension cord is 5,000 feet long.

Now pass me a brewskie and let’s turn up the music because it’s Freedom Rock, so turn it up!!!

“Free screening of Caddyshack in Room 201 at 6:00.”

EMPTY
HOTEL
PARTY

… it’s been tapped.

EMPTY HOTEL PARTY 4 LIFE

Everyone knows the best kind of party is an Empty Hotel Party, when you and your buddies (or bbud3z, as hackers type it) run wild in empty conference rooms and eat old pudding from walk-in refrigerators and call people and say, “Hello, this is the Holiday Inn. We have to cancel all your reservations forever because we are drunk.”

As a wise man once said, “The only rule for an Empty Hotel Party is … there are no rules.” Which is actually stupid, because there is a rule for an Empty Hotel Party, which is that if you’re throwing an Empty Hotel Party, you have to spray-paint the phrase “EMPTY HOTEL PARTY!!!” in every room you visit.

And with that said, let’s continue this party!

EMPTY HOTEL PARTY!!!