Shatner’s 15 minutes collide with Palin’s 15 seconds

William Shatner doing a zany Sarah Palin impression.

By this point, we’ve probably all seen the viral video of William Shatner’s performance on last night’s “Tonight Show.” If you missed it, though, here’s a recap: Shatner aped departing governor of Alaska Sarah Palin’s resignation speech in his signature staccato patois. It was zany. Hilarity ensued.

Yawn.

Are we honestly still making fun of this woman? A few weeks ago, Paul Begala ranted about Palin’s rambling, often unintelligible “I hate to quit you, Alaska, but I gotta” scrawl on her Web site. The skewering wasn’t clever, useful or worthy of the former “Crossfire” star’s time. I say star and not political commentator because that program, which was blessedly expunged from TV, featured four talking heads whose sole purpose was to see who could yell the loudest, and often (yes) the most incoherently. When comedian Jon Stewart derailed “Crossfire” during a guest appearance (he called the show “theater” and “hackery”), the journalism gods smiled a little before they disavowed it. Anyhow. The fundamental flaw in Begala’s argument about Palin’s lack of intelligence (as evinced by her writing abilities, he posits) is that he compares her to George W. Bush.

Wait a second, Pauley boy. The former president’s inarticulate good nature was scarily buoyed by his position of executive power. He truly did manage, and damage, the country – and did so with a Little Lord Fauntelroy-like sense of entitlement. By comparison, Palin was just entertaining. Her leadership in Alaska was not of the same scale, and not nearly as detrimental to the populace. But that accent! That borrowed wardrobe of expensive designer duds! (Nobody criticized Michelle Obama for wearing Valentino freebies donated by Valentino himself.) That verbal gaffe about Russia qualifying her as a candidate with foreign policy experience! And then that missive on her official PAC site that read as though it had been transcribed by www.icanhascheezburger.com and Mad Libs. Will we ridicule? You betcha! Palin’s a hunter. She must realize that a lame duck is hardly fair game.

But Begala isn’t alone in picking on her.

The blogs have been percolating with glee, reposting Shatner’s impression ad nauseam. It’s just so oddly tacked on to her departure.

So what is worth talking about? Shannyn Moore asserted that the Palins received a free house in exchange for a $13 million sports complex and hockey rink that is the lasting monument to Palin’s two terms as Wasilla mayor.

Todd Palin told Fox News that he built the two-story, 3,450-square-foot, four-bedroom, four-bath, wood house himself, with the help of contractors he described as “buddies.” As mayor, Sarah Palin blocked an effort to require the filing of building permits in the wide-open city, and there is no public record of who the “buddies” were. The house was built very near the complex, on a site whose city purchase led to years of unsuccessful litigation and, now, $1.3 million in additional costs, with a law firm that’s also donated to Palin collecting costly fees from the city.

Now we’re talking. I call that a good reason to hightail it. But to where and what?

Alaska’s now former governor is understandably coy about her future political plans, but radio is at least one option she’s leaving on the table. Apparently her reps have been quietly putting out feelers to see if radio syndicators have any interest in her.

“Quit making things up,” she told reporters in her final speech as Governor. Sarah Palin cut her teeth in the media, was built up by it, shared – then stole -the media spotlight during the Republican National Convention and has been systematically dismantled by it. Gossip about her children – salacious and easy as it was to dish out – was irrelevant but damaging to her career nonetheless.

And taking to the podium one last time, she practically pleaded with the mass media to just go away, already. Is it because she’s afraid of legal bugaboos surfacing, further tarnishing her image? Is it because she’s simply too tired to go on?

The Shatner parody was silly and harmless. But it was also unnecessary. The former captain of the Enterprise has excelled at this shtick before. Many times. The awkward vocal cadences were funny in the 60s when he was pretending to act, they were funny in the 70s and 80s when he decided to get in on the joke and ape himself, and he’s now his own best celebrity impersonator. But doing Palin before a Tonight Show crowd? The effort was apt but pat. (Is Conan already out of material?) As satire, this wasn’t bad form – it was shapeless.

So what’s next? Maybe Palin will surf the same airwaves that have all but sunk her future endeavors. The book deal? “Say a prayer for [her] editor,” Begala joked. The 2012 presidential bid? Not bloody likely. Gawker’s Alex Pareene gave one of the most lucid, even-keeled accounts of her public rise and fall by simply letting Sarah Palin speak for herself.

Yes, she lost it by the end. She was not quite ready for prime-time. And once the cameras started rolling, her life became a theater of the absurd, and she clearly became a caricature of herself. Why embellish?

Maybe she could become a sportscaster. Or a disc jockey. Betcha she won’t play Shatner’s rendition of “Mr. Tambourine Man.” Sarah Palin, we found out a lot about you, but we hardly knew ye. Let’s keep it that way, ‘mkay? As tired as you must be with the media, trust that if we’re resorting to Captain Kirk for political humor, the media’s about done with you, too.