Glenn Beck will believe anything and I have proof

As a masochistic idiot concerned citizen, I naturally follow Glenn Beck’s Twitter feed.  Most of the time, it’s about what you’d expect from the unhinged host:  a foundation of omnidirectional outrage , frequent misspellings, and paranoid fearmongering intermittently adorned with a thick glaze of gooey sentiment about his fans and his family.  Last night, however, he went above and beyond:

RT @FreetownBill: Pelosi says she’s abt 2 bring a vote 2 ban Fox News from covering Congress. http://ow.ly/wveK #ocra cnt B!

OK, to translate into English: RT means retweet, meaning Beck is passing this along from (or @) FreetownBill, with his only ‘contribution’ being “cnt B!” at the end, which I assume means “Can’t be!”  So, clearly, Beck is shocked by this major revelation.  As he should be, given that it would mean that the Speaker of the House is trying to crush an opposition media outlet with as much subtlety as you would expect from a Chavez or a Putin.  I was floored.  This was a monumentally stupid thing for Pelosi to say, much less attempt to do.

I followed the link, which said the quote was from an appearance on Keith Olbermann.  I googled the two names and “Fox News” and the word “ban” and only a few sites came up, referencing the same thing.  I was very confused.  How was this not getting more play?  I reread the post and noticed it was referencing a post by Lee Habeeb, producer for the Hugh Hewitt show.  (Hugh Hewitt is a very popular conservative radio host.  Picture someone with the stringent journalistic standards of Weekly World News and the raw animal magnetism of Morley Safer and you get the idea.)  Here’s the quote:

In an interview with MSNBC’s Keith Olberman last night, Nancy Pelosi announced that she would move to bring a vote to the floor of The House of Representatives as early as next week to ban Fox from covering Congress. ”That Fox regularly grants access to Republican Congressman to spread their lies and propaganda on their airwaves is a violation of the public trust, and their continued desire to challenge such well documented facts as Global Warming, and the efficacy of single payer health insurance, proves that they are simply doing the work of the special interests. They should thus be stripped of their journalistic access in the halls of Congress,” argued Pelosi.

Even on first glance, this read like a very formal robot writing a business letter, not a human being in 2009 speaking extemporaneously on a talk show.  Outside of colonial Williamsburg, who uses the phrase “They should thus” in casual conversation?  I glanced at the date of the quote: Oct. 28, 2009.  Ah, very clever, Jonny Satire: put a date three days from now, so even a complete lunkhead wouldn’t just read this, forward to everyone, and cause another massive, humiliating hemorrhaging of credibility to the right-wing blogosphere.  But oops, your safety valve failed.  This blog linked to the post, failing to notice either the dates or the increasingly ridiculous scenarios right below it, e.g. Gibbs bans Fox from annual Turkey Pardon because foxes and turkeys don’t get along.  Wocka wocka wocka!   Watch your back, Jonathan Swift -this Lee Habeeb kid is a comer.

I shouldn’t make fun, though, since clearly it was enough to fool half the conservatives on Twitter.  This fake rumor moved around last night like wildfire an easily debunked conspiracy theory through the right-wing noise machine.  It’s not really a surprise that Glenn Beck would pass along a random factoid from a fan as the gospel truth to his followers.  Still, it’s something else to see it happen live.  I take some pride in the fact* that I was the first person to notify** Beck that this was all make-believe.  He finally corrected it this morning, and a ripple of sadness swept through the conservative Twittersphere at having been hoodwinked.  Their reply?  What’s scary is how plausible it seemed.  And that, right there, tells you all you need to know about how reality-based the right-wing is these days.

*And by fact, I mean unverifiable belief.

** And by notify, I mean shove back in his face with derision and mockery.