The Spy Trade Show
Shouldn’t we remember that, by definition, clandestine agents like to skulk in the dark shadows, jealously guarding the secrecy of their creepy creeping? So mightn’t we want to be just a tad suspicious about the clamor of publicity concerning the recent espionage game playing.
Suddenly, the spy biz has become show biz. About all we haven’t seen of that suburban ring is a program called “The Real Russian Housewives.” And one has to believe that Playboy and/or Hustler have been in touch with the redhead. I see a centerfold coming.
Of course, they’ll need to shoot it in Moscow, or somewhere, because that’s where the ring members are taking up residence, now that they have been deported, uprooted from being embedded in our bedroom communities.
Their charade could hardly be called “Deep Cover.” Given the superficiality of the ‘burbs, “Shallow Cover” seems more appropriate. And these moles were removed by the FBI, not the usual lawn care service.
But you know the whole story. And there can be only one explanation for that: it’s phony. It’s gotta be made up. It is either a concoction of the news networks, looking for something to over-cover when even the President Obama show seems to have gone on hiatus.
Or it was their desperate attempt to come up with programming to match the breathless Lebron-James- Goes-From-Cleveland-To-Miami-Duhhhh melodrama on ESPN.
It could well have been an insidiously clever plot on BP’s part to distract from their destruction of an entire region of the United States, their former colony. I kinda doubt that explanation because that would mean they’re good at PR and what we’ve witnessed would suggest that the only ones worse are Gen. McChrystal and his crew.
My favorite possibility is that it’s just another ploy by the aforementioned redhead to get publicity. This is even bigger than Facebook!! The woman is amazing. Who knew there were so many ways to pout?
What’s really remarkable is that the two teams pulled this off before the trading deadline. For those who are not sports fans, that’s a baseball reference, but you’re still probably wondering who this guy Lebron James is.
In this case, they pulled off a sensational swap…10 minor leaguers sent from the Washington Nationals in exchange for four star players from the Moscow Reds, along with who knows how many players to be named later.
Whatever, it has been great beach reading. It’ll be a terrific movie. Let’s call it “The Cul De Sac Capers.” It’s so juicy the nervous producers and executives won’t even emasculate the script. To those who would argue “You can’t make this stuff up,” I would say “Sure you can.” It’s not that “Truth is stranger than fiction,” what’s really strange is that we believe a word of it.
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I’ve been reading Tim Weiner’s “Legacy of Ashes” about the history of the CIA.
If only the CIA could have had success for a whole 10 years, planting anybody anywhere. (OK, I’m only up to 1960, but at that point, they had ZERO assets in Russia, China, Korea, Indonesia, or almost anywhere else that weren’t outright lying to them.)
The Russians are widely regarded as the best at this stuff. I think the current slate of arrests reflect just how hard it is to embed your own people in a foreign country and have them operate at intelligence-gathering to any degree and get away with it.
Credit the Russians with at least playing the long game. Our side tends to tell the CIA “Create some assets for us in Iran. By next year.” The poor CIA complies, but is generally being BS’d by some Iranian that in fact knows nothing and is making up his “reports”.
And THAT is when the CIA isn’t already kidding the President with some agenda of its own…or the very top is using the CIA to kid everybody with yet another agenda.
“Curveball”, for instance.
It’s fun to jeer at the Russians right now, but it would be easier if our own ‘team’ were not so often an embarrassment.